johnguinness's Diaryland Diary
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every breath you take
That's the sad finish to today's Giro stage. It brought a few tears. The group decided to ride the course with no racing today. Each team rode at the front, doing the work, for ten kilometers. The guys not at the front rode along silently, or exchanged a few words or memories with riders from other teams. At the end, it was Wouter's teammates who crossed the line together, along with Wouter's best friend who rides for another team.
I walked this morning, and it was ugly. My breathing has been scary lately. I won't go into details, but don't think I've been a slacker for not venturing out for exercise. I did a bit of online research yesterday to rule things out. I guess it's good that I'm not coughing. I think I figured out two things that are responsible, and if I had $150 cash right now, the problem could be sorted by the weekend. But that's not the case. As a clue, I'm hoping that it's a problem with oxygen saturation.
I've been thinking a lot about the Township people who turned me down for $285 a month for six months of help with rent & utilities. I'm not going through the appeal process - here as explanation I'd insert a quote from Matt Damon in Good Will Hunting when asked why he always chose the wrench when his father was about to beat him - but I have been mentally writing them a letter. I have no money, no assets, and the woman in charge decided that I'm disabled, and I still didn't qualify for a dime of help. It makes me wonder what it is about me that disqualifies me, and why they bothered even having me go through the application and interview process.
The plan for now is to force the exercise, at least in minimal amounts. I'm going to get on the Lifecycle later and see how long I can last on the seat. It would be good for me to be able to get my legs going and improve circulation without redlining. It would be perfect right now if I had a membership at Golds and could do pool workouts every day. Meanwhile, I'm looking at a bit of emergency weight loss to ease the pressure. The weight thingy at the bottom of the page is active and up to date, if you'd like to follow along.
Well, there's a fresh tennis tournament, and I've got hours of Monday night TV to catch up on. Take care.
Edit: As soon as I posted that, I went looking for a price for a replacement mask for my CPAP machine. A few weeks ago, pieces of gel fell out, so some of the air meant to go in my nose shot into my right eye or across my left cheek instead. The way I test my head position and things is to open my mouth and hear the big rush of air. I've been using pieces of duct tape that doesn't really stick to the mask to keep the air from shooting at the aforementioned places. Last night I put it on and opened my mouth, and from several positions there was barely any air coming out my mouth. That would mean my apnea kicks in, I go periods of time without breathing, and some of my red blood cells don't bother to carry oxygen the next day. I called my sister to ask the favor, and she insisted I get overnight delivery. I might stay up until it comes tomorrow. Anyway, I hope that a few nights with the new one will let me get back on the exercise track. Then I just need a new air mattress to get my back straightened out, because I think that's also part of the problem.
11:36 a.m. - Tuesday, May. 10, 2011
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